20 Essential Life Lessons For Happiness And Success

A recent birthday got me reflecting on my journey to this age, and I’m happy to say that, compared with the younger me, I’m much more at peace with myself, content with my life, confident of what I want and sure of how to get there.

I often write about how to attain career and money success, and while many practical tips can get you ahead, your personal approach to professional and financial matters, as well as your way of dealing with your own demons, will take you to even higher heights than any amount of knowledge can.

Here are some lessons I’ve learned over the years. Hopefully they’ll prove as useful to you as they have been to me.

1. Know that  what you focus your mind on grows bigger.

This tip, which I learned in an incredible course called Something Different for Women (currently on hiatus), helped get me out of a funk and turn my life around — simply by changing my mindset. If you constantly think about bad things in your life, like your annoying coworker or a recent mistake, then she/he/it will take up a disproportionate amount of your mental space. On the other hand, if you focus instead on your recent successes, your new goals and your fun coworkers, not only will your days be more pleasant and the irritating coworker or temporary defeat fade to the background, but the positive things in your life will grow and flourish.

As the unattributed quote goes, “Watch your thoughts for they become words, watch your words for they become actions, watch your actions, for they become habits, watch your habits for they become your character, watch your character for it becomes your destiny.” Having a mind filled with negative thoughts will lead to a negative life, and a mind filled with positivity will breed a positive one.

(János Csongor Kerekes/Flickr)

2. Don’t take things personally.

Many freelance writers pitch story ideas to editors and then, if the editor doesn’t respond, immediately assume that s/he hated the pitch and hates the writer — and 99.9% of the time, the editor is just busy. Even when people aren’t busy but mean, it’s not about you – it’s about them. They had a bad day, a bad childhood or haven’t eaten lunch yet. I once worked with someone who was mean, but I knew she would have been mean whether I was there to be the victim or not.  Your life will be much happier if you don’t mentally wound yourself by making other people’s actions about you.

3. Express gratitude — daily.

The first two guidelines are not easy to follow. But one habit that will smooth their adoption is taking a moment daily to acknowledge the good in your life. (Swallow any temptation to resist because you think it’s cheesy. It takes courage to not give a damn about what others think of you and instead be sincere.) Write a gratitude list of at least five things that you email to yourself, or before dinner, have each family member say what he or she is each grateful for. Pick a method that works for you — writing it down or sharing it with others. (Just don’t do it mentally to yourself, as the ritual won’t stick.) Expressing gratitude exercises your positivity muscle and makes it easier to remain even-keeled during bad times. When you get laid off, a practice of gratitude will remind you you still have your health, or if you have a bike accident, you’ll be especially grateful for your friends and family.

The Forbes eBook To Succeed In A Brutal Job Market 
Don’t let a rotten economy spoil your goals. Use the career and money advice in The Millennial Game Plan to get and stay ahead for good.

4.  Stand up for yourself but don’t act entitled.

There’s a fine line dividing the people who think they are owed everything and the people who are scared to ask for everything. Don’t be on either side of this line. If you’re not sure if you’re being exploited or treated poorly, ask your friends and family or others in your line of work what’s appropriate. If you think the other party is taking advantage of you, speak up for yourself. On the other hand, be aware when you haven’t earned something. Others will be less inclined to help you if you act as if you are owed the world on a platter.

5.  Ask for 100% of what you want from 100% of people 100% of the time.

I got this amazing advice during an incredible writing workshop held by my fellow Forbes contributorDavid Hochman, who learned it in David Richo’s book How to Be an Adult. As long as you know you are not on the entitled side of the line mentioned above, being upfront about your needs and wants eliminates a lot of angst and inconvenience and discomfort in your life — and makes room for ease. Just ask for what you want instead of wringing your hands over whether to, how to or what’s reasonable to. Unless your request is outrageous, which you should know in your gut (or from asking friends and colleagues), the worst that can happen is that the answer is no. Reasonable requests shouldn’t damage the relationship, and if someone thinks less of you because of you dared state what you need, find better people to work with in the future.

6. Learn to like rejection. 

Every rejection means you’re one rejection closer to the next yes. As Hochman says, “You’ll never write for The New Yorker unless you pitch The New Yorker.” So, always put yourself out there, and get used to being rejected. No one will ever have a perfect batting average, so pile up the rejections in order to get the yeses.

7. Recognize that money gives you freedom.

I used to be interested in pretty much everything but money. If that describes you too, remember that if you don’t take care of your money, you could become a slave to debt and lack the freedom to pursue your goals. Get a budget and learn the basics of personal finance so you don’t fritter your money away on things you don’t value. (For a primer, check out this series on financial accounts, budgeting,cutting costs, and negotiating salary and raises, and read about how I manage my own finances.) You’ll be happiest when you spend in line with your values, but doing so takes conscious effort.

8. Always negotiate. 

Every little bump in salary or fee you negotiate for yourself will mean bigger future boosts and more money over your lifetime.  And that will make it much easier for you to accomplish your goals, whether related to your career, buying a house, getting married, sending your kids to college or traveling. (Again, check out that all important article on negotiating.) Learn to ask for more money than you’re comfortable asking for.

9. Start investing early.

Investing early makes saving money, especially for the difficult task of amassing a retirement nest egg, much, much easier. As I wrote in my story oninvesting secrets, “If Person A saves $5,000 a year from age 25 to 40 for a total of $75,000 and then never invests another penny, and Person B invests $5,000 every year from 40 to 65 for a total of $125,000 invested, assuming 5% growth, Person A will end up with more than $400,000 by retirement, while Person B will only have $256,000, simply because Person A started saving earlier, even if she put away less.” Just by starting earlier, you could have $150,000 more by retirement! This is the equivalent of someone offering you a free $150,000 right now with the only catch being that you have to wait for the money till retirement. If they did, you would take the offer, yes? Then, start saving and investing asap and make it a lifelong habit. (Read the investing secrets that will help you beat other investors, and avoid the top mistakes investors make.)

10. Do one thing at a time.

This bit of Zen wisdom is more relevant than ever. Eat when you eat. Walk when you walk. Enjoy the flavors and textures of your food. Pay attention to the feel of your bare foot on the wood floor. Don’t multitask. This takes conscious effort. Sometimes I absentmindedly pick up my phone to check Facebook just to walk from one room to another. Flooding your mind with these distractions uses mental energy and depletes your brain power for important undertakings. Set rules around your gadget use, single task as much as possible, and appreciate the extra energy you have. (Read here for more tips on how to decrease noise in your life and use stress to your advantage and how to perform at your peak every day.)

11. Accept and enjoy where you are right now.

Life is always changing and soon the current rhythm of your days will morph into something new. There was a period when I was upset about being unmarried, but then I realized that I might someday miss my single days. Now I make sure to enjoy every one.

12. Get a regular dose of nature.

Every day, connect with nature in some way, large or small. Even if your schedule is packed, spend a minute observing the patterns the raindrops make against your window. Watch a tree as it bends and moves with the wind. And yes, smell the roses. Studies have shown that nature has a rejuvenating effect, and appreciating it is an easy way to be present in the moment.

13. Sweep your side of the street.

Another pearl of wisdom from the Something Different course. If you have a problem with someone and need to air it out with them, first figure out what you did wrong. You can’t find a solution to the problem until you also know how you contributed to it, and they won’t make peace until you acknowledge your role.

14. Know that people who talk about other people behind their backs are also talking about you behind yours.

These people aren’t real friends. The world has plenty of non-gossips from among whom you can choose true friends.

15. Don’t hold a grudge.

In the spirit of asking for 100% of what you want from 100% of people 100% of the time, if you need to cut someone out of your life, do so. But holding a grudge saps your energy. (Remember — what you focus your mind on grows bigger!) So, set boundaries but don’t stew over the reason you had to establish them. Learn your lesson, then move on.

16. Always put in your best effort, so that you never have regrets or wonder ‘what if.’

Sometimes, special opportunities come along in life. Whether or not you get any particular one is not that important, because even if you don’t get this one, another opportunity will come along. But what will leave a lasting effect is not trying your best, not getting the gig, and being left wondering, What if? Don’t do that. Put your best foot forward so you know whether you were judged on your true merit and not a half-baked effort.

17.  Lasting change in life starts with daily habits.

If you imagine a different future for yourself, don’t think that you’ll suddenly shed your current life one day and become an entirely new person. What can you do now to get there? Start incorporating that into your life today. Eventually that habit will snowball, and through a combination of persistence and luck, you’ll find yourself in the life you once dreamed of. As E.L. Doctorow said, ‘Writing a novel is like driving a car at night. You can see only as far as your headlights, but you can make the whole trip that way.’”

18. Ask yourself, “Will this matter in a year?”

Another Hochman gem. When you face certain decisions — i.e. taking a couple days off work to take a trip with your aging parents or turning down social events for a couple weeks to do a stellar job for your dream client — go with the course that you’ll be glad you chose a year from now.

19. Treat others with kindness and understanding.

Everyone has his or her own baggage, problems and worries, and is also striving for happiness and the freedom to pursue his or her own dreams. It’s not a winner-take-all kind of situation. Helping someone out, being nice to them or even just smiling at a stranger will have ripple effects. If you’ve ever had someone do something nice for you, you’ve probably felt the compulsion to pay it forward, so set that chain in motion yourself. Kindness costs little but pays rich rewards to everyone.

20. Know that  how you use your mind is in your power.

Underlying all the above principles is the fact that at every moment, you have a choice as to how to use your mind, and that, in turn, gives you control over the course of your life. You can act with love or hate, kindness or meanness, big-heartedness or pettiness, mindfulness or absentmindedness — and the more you opt for the first of those choices, the more love, kindness, big-heartedness and mindfulness you’ll have in your life.

Can They Fire You When You're Doing A Good Job?

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You would not necessarily guess before you take an HR position that a lot of the job involves educating people.

You wouldn’t think that so much of your day as an HR person would be spent listening to your teammates and answering their questions about a host of workplace issues.

I was leading a big employee meeting where our new credit union account manager came to explain the basics of household finance to my colleagues. It was a tremendous meeting, because it educated me about how little some folks know about living on a budget or managing their finances. It made me really sad to see the gap that persisted after our employees had graduated from high school and sometimes even college. They had jobs, but their questions showed me that for some folks their grasp of basic economics was very shaky.

We heard the question all the time in meetings with the credit union rep: “How can I have no money in my account when I still have checks left?”

We don’t kids teach kids about personal finance, and that’s a shame. We don’t teach them a lot of important things, like basic communication and conflict resolution skills. We don’t emphasize critical thinking and we ignore non-linear problem-solving. We slap kids down for stepping out of line. That’s the opposite of what we should be doing. Remember the command “show your work” in math class? Why teach a kid that there’s only one right way to solve a problem?

Lots of working people don’t understand Thing One about employment law. Why should they know that stuff? We don’t teach that in high school either. How can you let a kid out of high school without teaching him how to get a job? Yet we do, year after year.

Employees asked me questions about work and life and the subject we call HLOE – - Human Life on Earth — all the time. It was a huge part of my job to explain things. I always felt like the person letting a kid in on the Santa secret when I had to have conversations like this one:

JANELLE, A YOUNG EMPLOYEE: So, if I do a good job, I’ll probably work here for a long time, right?

ME: Well, who knows, Janelle. I hope so, but I don’t know exactly what will happen in the company, for you or me or anyone. In the business world, things can change any time.

JANELLE: What do you mean?

ME: Well, I don’t mean to scare you, but we are in the high tech industry. Our company is growing fast, and that’s fantastic. The experience you and I are getting will be invaluable to us, no matter what we do. But the high tech world is also very volatile. I’ve seen companies grow incredibly fast and others blink out of existence. This is not as secure a job as, let’s say, the Vatican.

JANELLE: You don’t think you will retire from here?

ME: I can’t imagine that I will, Janelle. I’m thirty-five years old. I have a million years left before retirement, and you have many more than I do. I don’t want you to think about this job as a place to work until retirement.

JANELLE: Why not?

ME: That wouldn’t be good for you. We all need to be alert and aware and focus on building our skills. That makes us more marketable.

JANELLE: To who?

ME: To our next employer, or client.

JANELLE: But if I do a good job, doesn’t the company have to keep me here?

ME: Janelle, if you do a good job there’s no reason you should leave here if you don’t want to, but there’s no way to predict what will happen in the world. The company could shut down. That’s the opposite of what’s happening now, but who can imagine that the unbelievable growth will go on forever?

JANELLE: You mean they could lay people off here?

ME: I’ve been here for seven years and we haven’t laid anyone off. But there was a layoff here before I arrived.

JANELLE: Wow! Okay, one more question. If there isn’t a layoff, is it legal for a company to fire a person?

ME: Legal? Yes, it’s legal. It’s called Employment at Will. It means that companies get let employees go without a reason, as long as they don’t discriminate when they do that.

JANELLE: No reason at all? Just — “You’re fired?”

ME: Based on the law, no reason is needed – you could follow the wrong sports team or drive the wrong kind of car. That’s the law. As long as I’m in this job, we’re not going to do that here, but I want you to understand how the world works, since you asked me “Can they legally let me go?”

JANELLE: I had no idea. I thought they had to keep you if you did your work. You mean, you could hit all your goals, month after month, and one day they can still let you go?

ME:  Legally, yes.

I think Employment at Will is a massive drag on profitability, because it gives people a reason to clam up when they should be singing from the rafters about how their company could be healthier and more productive. Why would anyone speak up when the smallest disagreement could get them bounced from their job?

At the same time, as long as Employment at Will is the law of the land (in the U.S., anyway) we may as well speak our truth at every opportunity. If you can be let go when you’re doing a wonderful job, then that’s a signal from the universe to be ready to go at any moment, good job or not. A

ssume that when you rub someone the wrong way merely for sharing ideas that are intended to help the organization, you’re not supposed to be working there anyway. The quicker you can flee a place like that, the faster your flame will grow.

Yes, you can be fired when you’re doing a great job, if you scare somebody who wishes you weren’t quite as bright and shiny an object as you happen to be. That’s okay. You have no time to waste with fearful ninnies. Your future is big and bright, and it’s right in front of you. Go find it!

Employees’ attitudes to working and living in Britain – interactive

An ICM poll commissioned by the Guardian in association with income protection provider Unum, provides a unique insight into how we handle our money and how we think of the future. It also reveals that UK employees are increasingly worried about their health, wealth and income. Click on the interactive guide below to see what it found

Work-life Balance: Attitude and Behavior in the Work Place Matching Expectations and Closing Generation Gaps
	This is a summary of the paper presented by the authors at the World Association for Public Opinion Research (WAPOR) 66th Annual Conference held in Boston in mid-May. The paper applies public opinion research techniques to study and address the issue of work-life balance (WLB) in Hong Kong, using the framework of generation analysis, like those using concepts of “post-80s” and “post-90s”. The authors aggregated primary data collected through 19 surveys, all conducted by the Public Opinion Programme (POP) at the University of Hong Kong from 2006 – 2012. A total of 14,486 valid cases were included. 　　In late 1970s, the expression “work-life balance” first appeared in U.K. A movement followed and innovators started to think about new ways of working. It was not until 1986 that this phrase was first used in the United States. Meanwhile, the term Generation Y (born in 1977-94) first appeared in 1993, in contrast to Generation X (1966-76) and Boomers (1946-65). Generation Y is considered to be independent, confident, diverse and to them, WLB is a necessity, not a luxury. Besides, the presence of technology has fundamentally changed Generation Y's attitude and behavior in the workplace. WLB is hence recognised as the leading retention strategy for Generation Y. Current WLB and Job Satisfaction 　　According to our surveys, each employee worked around 50 hours per week on average but only spent 11 hours on personal activities. Employees in Hong Kong were known to work the longest hours in Asia Pacific. 　　The top 5 work-life initiatives offered by the local employers were career breaks / unpaid personal leave (35%), flexible working time (27%), extra paid leave (26%), option to work remotely (21%), and job-sharing (15%). However, around one-fifth (22%) of employers did not offer any of the above work-life initiatives. 　　When it came to overall job satisfaction before the economic tsunami, Boomers were the most contented group with a net satisfaction (i.e. satisfaction % minus dissatisfaction %) of 45%, whereas the respective figures for Generations X and Y were 40% and 43%. The gap among generations after the tsunami was significantly widened, as the figures changed to 53%, 47% and 38%. Generation Y also scored the lowest mark at 5.7 out of 10 in terms of the degree to which they had achieved their ideal WLB, while those for Boomers and Generation X were 5.9 and 6.0. Importance of Various Job Attributes 　　Of the 16 job-related attributes measured in our job satisfaction survey model, findings showed that there were similarities and differences among different generations for what they valued most. Salary was no doubt one of the most important factors for everybody, but what mattered too differed across generations. Boomers also concerned about the environment safety and job security. Generation X cared about their job security and relationship with boss/supervisor, whereas for Generation Y, relationship with co-workers ranked high followed by safety at the workplace. As compared to the other 15 attributes put to test, work flexibility attained the lowest net importance value across all generations. However, since the values were all positive, work flexibility was still perceived as an important factor in an absolute sense. 　　In order to create and maintain a highly-engaged workforce, the most ideal scenario would be to achieve high satisfaction for all important attributes that mattered to the employees, but it was easier said than done. One possible strategy was to locate some important attributes which still had ample room for improvement in terms of employee satisfaction, and which might have been overlooked by the employers. By contrasting employees’ perceived importance and satisfaction towards each of the 16 attributes by each generation, 7 attributes stood out, namely 1) career advancement, 2) job variety, 3) management recognition, 4) meaningfulness, 5) professional development, 6) salary and 7) work flexibility. They all exhibited one common characteristic: their net importance of Generation Y is the highest, whereas Generation Y’s net satisfaction with them is the lowest. In other words, these were the most generation-sensitive aspects with very diversified views from different generations. Of these 7 “problematic” attributes identified, regardless of the economic situation and job nature, work flexibility appeared to be the most uncomplicated and affordable way for employers to increase satisfaction because its implementation would cost very little. Matching Expectations and Closing Generation Gaps 　　Nearly 60% of employees admitted that flexible work arrangements was an important factor when they considered joining or staying with an organization, especially for Generation Y, with a net importance value of 50%, as contrast to 22% and 27% only for Boomers and Generation X. 　　Furthermore, prolonged fatigue, insomnia, stressed out, reduced productivity and absenteeism were all commonly reported problems resulting from poor WLB. Even worse, some employees would actually consider leaving their current job for better WLB. Generation differences after the tsunami was great, as the figures for Boomers, Generation X and Generation Y were 22%, 36% and 53% respectively. This finding further substantiated the significance of work-life initiatives in recruiting, attracting and keeping the young talents in their workplace. 　　Given there might be plentiful choices for flexible work arrangements, employers should carefully prioritize what measures should be implemented first, and to which target groups. Survey statistics showed that flexible working time topped the list as the most wanted work arrangement across all generations. The second most wanted item was career breaks for both Boomers and Generation Y. As for Generation X, the second and third place went to option to work remotely, then career breaks. For third place for Boomers and Generation Y, they are job-sharing and compressed work week respectively. 　　As regards employees’ assessment of how much effort their boss had paid to promote WLB, for Boomers, they seemed to appreciate more of their boss’ effort after surviving the financial crisis as the average had increased from 4.8 to 4.9. For Generation X, the scores stayed at 4.6, whereas for Generation Y, the score dropped from 4.8 to 4.7, meaning their expectations on their bosses were mounting after the economic crisis. All scores failed to reach the passing mark of 5. 　　One possible explanation for such poor assessments was that what the employers currently provided was a total mis-match of what the employees wanted. Findings showed a landslide majority of employees failed to get what they most desired. Taking flexible working time as an example, the proportion of employees who had this desire fulfilled accounted for 34%, 26% and 20% only for Boomers, Generation X and Generation Y. With respect to career breaks, the yet-to-be-matched percentages were as high as 60%, 79%, and 67%. It remained a big challenge for the employers to fulfill their employees’ expectations for various flexible work arrangements, and to close the different gaps across different generations. Conclusion and Discussion 　　The Hong Kong workforce is no doubt "hard-working", as each member worked for an average of 50 hours per week, but it is doubtful whether they are also "playing hard". The self-accessed WLB achieved is only 5 to 6. Long working hours coupled with work-life imbalance hamper employees' health and morale. It is therefore natural that our Generation Y pays more attention to the issue of WLB nowadays. 　　Because of generation differences in terms of WLB expectations, employers using simple administrative approach to handle all WLB arrangements in one go will lose their edge, especially if they lose the support of Generation Y. Moreover, this study has found a general mismatch between the WLB arrangements provided by the boss and what their employees really want. Significant efforts are therefore wasted, resulting in an unhappy workforce. The best employer should be the one who pays special effort to understand their subordinates, and also recognises the value of WLB in increasing productivity. 　　In a way, this paper is the first of its kind in applying public opinion research techniques to study and address the issue of WLB in Hong Kong, using the framework of generation analysis. The division of Hong Kong’s labor force into Boomers, Generation X and Generation Y appears to have high practical value for academics and business leaders. The authors hope that this study would trigger more researches along this line. 　　However, in light of the ever changing socio-political environment, it may be too early to decide whether “Boomers”, “Generation X”, “Generation Y”, “pre-80s”, “post-80s”, “post-90s”, or “screenagers” can best describe the process of social change at large.

how to have a rubbish attitude at work

I met the rubbish collector pictured at the edge of a bitterly cold pier on a miserable winter’s day, and his positive attitude at work lit up the gloom. 

It also got me thinking about various jobs that I’ve held in the past and how easy it was to complain about them.  Boring, repetitive, full of red tape, overly busy, uncreative… I could go on – and did!

But, as the rubbish collector reminded me – jobs are like relationships.  They’re not perfect.  They need attention or they go stale.  They’re a two-way street.

One of the biggest influencers on job satisfaction is not the ‘rubbish’ you deal with at work, but the attitude you bring.  It’s easy to rattle off what’s wrong with the ‘other party’ (eavesdrop in any bar after work on a Friday and you’ll hear plenty of work-related whinging).

Harder, but far more proactive, is to look for areas where you could improve your relationship with your job.  What are you doing to nuture and grow in the role?  Are you letting things stagnate, while you become resentful?  Are you working chaotically?  Are you avoiding a problem with a team-mate?

As another year wraps up, our thoughts start turning to ‘what next?’  A new job often features in New Year’s Resolutions.  Whether or not that is on the cards for you, it can be healthy to look at how you can inject some new energy into your current role.

Ask this in terms of the ‘Be/Do/Have’ model:  ‘Who do I need to be, and what do I need to do, to have a more satisfying work life?’

For every one of the ‘problems’ you find with your work, look for a solution that involves you doing something differently.   It’s not about identifying areas where your work is ‘bland’ (a dead-end approach that only feeds negativity), but areas where you are BEING bland:

• How can you change your approach in a difficult relationship with a colleague?
• What’s missing in your understanding of a complex task that, if you mastered it, would help you move forward faster?
• Which specific training courses or changes in method would provide you with the quickest shortcuts in the routine areas of your job?
• Which of your skills are being under-utilised, and how could you change that?
• What could you do to be better organised and more efficient with your time?
• Where are you under-performing and why?
• How are you managing your work-life balance?

In coaching, we talk about ‘cause and effect’.  In any situation, we can choose to see ourselves as ‘causing’ our outcomes (through our attitudes, choices and actions) or being ‘at effect’ (passively waiting for things to happen ‘to us’, avoiding blame and making excuses).

Seeing ourselves as the ‘cause’ of outcomes (good and bad) means the ball is in our court much more often – which gives us far more freedom and responsibility and many more opportunities to change the way things are.

Perhaps it will take more than a few strings of tinsel to improve your lot at work, but that’s a great first step.

What would be the next step after that?

And the next?

Attitude to work/life

Our work philosophy is simple – to allow ourselves and each of the TQSolutions team to wrap work commitments around life commitments, whatever these may be. Sometimes work needs to come first… and more often than not life and family need to be prioritised. Importantly, it is the employee not the company that is in control of their life/work choices and career journey.

To achieve this as a business there are certain decisions we have made and beliefs we hold true, namely:

1.     A genuine commitment to a virtual office and the adoption of (cloud) infrastructure to support a robust and congruent business ethos. It’s easier to keep this committment if we don’t lease any office space.
2.    A genuine commitment to flexible working arrangements and an acceptance of people’s desire for part time, predominantly home-based and flexible working patterns.
3.    An acceptance and comfort that sometimes an employee’s life commitments will be prioritised over work demands, after all work is a choice and life events are often not; as a business you need to be prepared to reallocate work and client projects, sometimes at short notice.
4.    Have complete trust that your staff are capable of managing their own time, work output and client deliverables; you cannot afford to be a controlling micro-manager constantly seeking reassurance the work is being done by building a team of experienced, competent consultants.
5.    You must clarify objectives and expectations (tasks, deliverable and milestones) clearly and in advance of work being performed.
6.    Finally, you must hire well and engage appropriate resource with consistent values and attitudes towards work and life commitments.

International attitudes to work

Every country has its own common work ethics and attitude. We ask some people who've worked abroad for their views on how taking a lead from overseas could help your working life here at home.

Which of these attitudes do you share? Check out My Strengths to find out what you’re best at.

Top tips from around the world

The attitude and perceptions of work-life balance: a comparison among women surgeons in Japan, USA, and Hong Kong China.

Abstract

BACKGROUND:

The objective of the present study was to explore how women surgeons manage their work-life balance in three environmental and cultural settings.

METHOD:

Members of the Japan Association of Women Surgeons (JAWS), the United States of America (US) based Association of Women Surgeons (AWS), and the Women's Chapter of the College of Surgeons of Hong Kong (WCHK) were surveyed.

RESULTS:

Among 822 women surgeons contacted, 252 responded (response rate 31.8 %; 55.5 % JAWS, 28.2 % AWS, and 25.3 % WCHK). Japanese women surgeons think that work is the number one priority, whereas US and Hong Kong China (HK) respondents think the number one priority is home life. Work satisfaction level was generally high among women surgeons in all countries; however, 19 % of US surgeons are somewhat dissatisfied with their work and 76.1 % think that men are treated more favorably than women at work. Whereas 51.6 % of Japanese women surgeons think that men are treated more favorably than women at home, at the same time they placed more importance on the role of women in the family. More than half of Japanese women surgeons are "uncertain" about their career path in the future, whereas 55.2/87.1 % of US/HK respondents are optimistic. All surgeons recommended expanding support for child rearing or nursing care during work hours, promoting a flexible work schedule and changing some of the older conventional ideas about gender role.

CONCLUSIONS:

It is essential to address women surgeons' concerns to enable them to have a clearer vision and a challenging career, and to be more certain about their personal and professional goals.

Working Mother Generations Report Reveals Wide Disparity On Attitudes Towards Work Life Balance

NEW YORK, -- A new survey of 2,163 moms and dads about the impact their generational status has on their own work life choices and satisfaction was released today by the Working Mother Research Institute. The study, which examines attitudes of Millennials, Generation X and Baby Boomers, finds Millennials are the happiest generation of parents, reporting they have a secure and stable job (65%), are upbeat about their family finances (64%) and are most satisfied with their relationship with their spouse (71%).  But not all their news is rosy: Millennials express ambivalence about the current state of work-life balance, with 60% saying they believe one parent should stay home to care for the children.

Commissioned to mark the 35th anniversary of Working Mother magazine, the "Working Mother Generations Report" found the greatest disparity in generational attitudes on work-life issues lies between Millennials (born 1981-2000) and Baby Boomers (born 1946-1964).  The full research report, which is sponsored by SC Johnson, can be found here. Highlights include:

• A total of 71% of Millennials says they are satisfied with their choice to be a working or stay-at-home parent vs. 59% of Boomers.
• Millennials report higher satisfaction with their relationship with their spouse/partner, with 71% reporting they are satisfied vs. 56% for Boomers.
• 75% of Millennials are satisfied with their partners' contribution to the family's finances, while only 58% of the Boomers are.
• Millennials score highest (60%) in believing one parent should stay home to care for the children, over Generation X (50%) and Boomers (55%). And yet, they also are more likely to believe that when a mom works outside the home, it sets a positive example for her children (62%), Gen X (57%) and Boomers (55%).

Carol Evans, president of Working Mother Media, says, "This report finds fascinating differences among the generations, with parents in each group having their own ideas about the best ways to manage career and family obligations. These are important differences employers should note as they tailor work life policies to benefit the widest range of working parents."

WIDE GENERATION GAPS ON VIEWS OF OUR OWN WORKING MOTHERS— AND WHAT WE WANT FOR OUR CHILDREN

Working Mother magazine launched in 1979, just as Boomer Moms entered the workforce in large numbers. Thirty-five years later, with 68% of partnered moms and 75% of single moms working outside the home, the impact of that major workforce shift is still being felt among the three generations making up the majority of American workers today.

• Millennial parents are more likely to say they are proud of their mom's decision to work (45% vs. 34% of Boomers and 37% of Gen Xers, who were born between 1965 and 1980).
• Mothers who are currently stay-at-home are almost as likely to have grown up with a working mom (74%) as those mothers who are now working themselves (78%).
• Surprisingly, less than half of the working moms surveyed say they hope their daughters will become working parents.. While an overwhelming majority of working moms want their sons and daughters to have a career (97% and 92%, respectively), only 38% hope their daughters will become working parents. By comparison, 78% of working moms hope their sons will become working parents.
• Notably, however, daughters brought up by breadwinning moms (the primary earner for their family) are more likely to say they are currently the primary earner for their own family.

Kelly M. Semrau, Senior Vice President—Global Corporate Affairs, Communication and Sustainability at SC Johnson, says, "As a mother of two girls, I felt a personal connection to this research, which is essential to understand working parents' needs by generation. With its valuable insights, businesses like ours can develop programs and benefits that address each generation."

VIEWS VARY ON WORK LIFE STRESS BY GENERATION

• More than half of all Millennials say that flex causes work to interfere with family time vs. only a quarter of Boomers. Millennials report working the same average hours—7.8 daily—as the other generations, but roughly half say they "cannot get away from work."
• Millennials are much more likely to say they would prefer to work even if they did not have to financially (47%) vs. Gen X (37%) and Boomers (36%).
• Gen X is the least likely generation to say they're fulfilling a higher purpose through work than just making money (13 percentage points lower than Millennials and 8 percentage points lower than Boomers).

Generation X has a "front row seat to work life tensions," says Working Mother Research Institute Director Jennifer Owens. "This is not that surprising, considering that this generation is striving to move into higher positions at work, while also working to guide their children through homework, after-school activities and everything else, with an eye towards college. Meanwhile, Boomers are thinking about their own future changes, including retirement, and are mostly likely to be dealing with elder care issues with their parents."

About the MethodologyAll 2,163 survey participants were between the ages of 18 and 64 years old with a child under 18 living at home with them at the time. Sixty percent of the respondents were currently employed, 40% were unemployed (either temporarily or voluntarily), 48% were Gen X, 35% Millennials and 17% Boomers. The Working Mother Research Institute developed the survey and fielded it online. Bonnier Custom Insights, a division of Bonnier Corporation, tabulated the responses, which were analyzed by Maria S. Ferris Consulting LLC.

About Working Mother MediaNow in its 35th year, Working Mother magazine reaches more than 2 million readers and is the only national magazine for career-committed mothers, while WorkingMother.com (www.workingmother.com) offers working mothers @home and @work advice, solutions, and ideas. This year marks the 29th anniversary of Working Mother's signature research initiative, Working Mother 100 Best Companies, and the twelfth year of the Best Companies for Multicultural Women. Working Mother Media, a division of Bonnier Corporation  (www.bonniercorp.com), includes the National Association for Female Executives (NAFE,www.nafe.com), Diversity Best Practices (www.diversitybestpractices.com), and the Working Mother Research Institute. Working Mother Media's mission is to serve as a champion of culture change.

About SC JohnsonSC Johnson is a family company dedicated to innovative, high-quality products, excellence in the workplace and a long-term commitment to the environment and the communities in which it operates. Based in the USA, the company is one of the world's leading manufacturers of household cleaning products and products for home storage, air care, pest control and shoe care. It markets such well-known brands as GLADE®, KIWI®, OFF!®, PLEDGE®, RAID®, SCRUBBING BUBBLES®, SHOUT®, WINDEX® and ZIPLOC® in the U.S. and beyond, with brands marketed outside the U.S. including AUTAN®, TANA®, BAMA®, BAYGON®, BRISE®, KABIKILLER®, KLEAR®, MR MUSCLE®, and RIDSECT®. The 128-year-old company, that generates $9 billion in sales, employs nearly 13,000 people globally and sells products in virtually every country around the world. www.scjohnson.com